Gaper's Blog

I've Seen This Happen, In Other People's Lives. Now It's Happening In Mine.

Talk about parking meters enough and I guess you eventually get stung.  In September of 2008, my employer moved from a non-desrcript single-story cinder block building in a semi-dodgy neighborhood to the 6th floor of NBC Tower, in the heart of Streeterville.  We also went from windowless to floor-to-ceiling windows with a gorgeous view of the Chicago River, Navy Pier, Lake Shore Drive.  The change in real estate also meant no more free parking, so with the two ticket threshold before getting the 'Denver boot', I settled up with the City of Chicago on two outstanding parking tickets that were complete and utter B.S..  I will own up when I have parked illegally but when I get tickets for no legitimate reason, I won't pay them, unless of course, I have to. Amazingly, I've managed to park in a very busy and crowded Chicago business district without any real issue for the last eighteen months, save one ludicrous incident I wrote about last summer. 

Last week, I found a killer parking spot in Lakeview, mere steps from my destination: The Improv Olympic (I/O) Theatre.  I went to the meter box to print out my ticket receipt and placed it very prominently on the curbside part of the dashboard.  It was 6:22PM and I had the spot until 7:37.  Imagine my surprise when I went to retrieve something from my car at 6:50 and found a parking ticket on my windshield for (wait for it) an 'expired meter'.  Even with the ticket tucked under the wiper, you could still plainly see the receipt.  Apparently, Stevie Wonder was on duty that night because not only did he fail to see the valid receipt, the photos presented as evidence looked as if they were taken by a sight-challenged individual.  These two photos are the actual photos they presented on the LAZ website as 'proof'.  All they prove to me is that LAZ doesn't drug test their employees. Want a cool job where you get to get high, walk around the city, take pictures and piss countless people off? Contact LAZ for parking enforcement positions.

I'll update here when I hear back from the City of Chicago Department of Revenue, I contested this ticket by mail.  My success rate contesting tickets by mail (9 for 12 in the last 15 years, only one of which was a legitimate violation) is decent.  My one and only experience contesting in person was a slam dunk (last summer) but I have better things to do with my time than take off work and prove my innocence in person every time I get a (bogus) ticket.  It's bad enough that we now have to pay double what we used to to park in an overcrowded city but to have to spend time to defend ourselves for completely unwarranted reasons is criminal.  If I do get this ticket expunged, I will write back and ask for a written apology from the idiot who wrote it.

Tell me about your favorite City of Chicago parking nightmare.  It's not whether or not you have one, it's just which is the best story to tell, drive in Chicago for more than fifteen minutes and you'll have a story.

Parking Carma

George Costanza famously likened paying for parking to prostitution.  He said if you just apply yourself, you can usually get it for free.  It's a trait I share with George (who I do realize isn't a real person).  Finding the perfect (free) parking place is one of those sublime things in life, not unlike witnessing a beautiful sunset or finding a four leaf clover.  For the first fourteen years at my job, this wasn't an issue as we were given a remote control button which opened the gate on a private, fenced-in parking lot.  Free, safe and guaranteed parking everyday.  That changed last fall as our company moved from a squat cinder block building on the nondescript Northwest Side of Chicago to a temporary home on the sixth floor of NBC Tower.  My excitement about finally working 'downtown' was tempered by the realization that we'd be on our own to find parking.  Oh sure, there was an offer to get 'discounted' rates at a garage across the street for only $140 a month.  It was my mission to find cheap and/or free parking, none of the $140 a month crap. Game on.

Now I knew Saturdays were gonna be rough, finding free on-street parking at 6PM would be nearly impossible, so I conceded that and found the cheapest flat-rate lot I could, which charged $12, not bad.  My challenge was find free on-street parking during the week, only paying when absolutely necessary.  After a fall and brutal winter weather of complete success finding semi-plentiful (free)parking, I got a phone call from one of my colleagues.  (See, those of us who followed the Costanza model looked out for each other, looking out for 'secret spots' and streets where we were likely to get lucky.  We even scouted spots for each other from our 6th floor studio once in a great while, alterting one another to open spaces when needed.)  The colleague said, "I found the most amazing spot tonight and there's room for both of our cars and it's totally legal!!"  Sure enough, it was a spot long enough for two small cars or one limo.  And it was literally fifteen feet from the front door of our building.  For weeks we parked there unfettered, the very definition of 'rock star parking'.  Then, one evening my colleague was stopped at the front desk and asked if the blue car out front was his.  He admitted it was his.  Despite signage that clearly indicated we were legal, he was told his car could be towed if he ever parked there again.  They also told him that if he knew the person who had the same make and model as he did that also parked there, he should warn them (me).  We were defiant, were not going to be scared away from perfectly legal, free spot, no matter the threat.  We figured we had the law on our side and had adquate proof of that should it ever come down to that.  

Then, one Saturday night I was denied a spot in my normal 'pay' lot (due to a valet service renting the whole lot for the night) so knowing the 'magic spot' (as we came to call it) became legal at 6PM, I checked to see if it was available. It was and I parked there.  When I got done with work that night I took the short walk to my car and saw a Chicago Police squad parked next to my car.  I didn't see a ticket on the windshield but saw the cop writing a ticket, so I unlocked my car, started it and drove off.  Two weeks later, I got a ticket in the mail.  It was from that night.  Undaunted, I sent it back requesting an in-person hearing.  On Monday, I drove to a facility across the street from Lane Tech High School and pleaded my case to an arbiter.  I presented five photographs which clearly demonstrated that I was completely legal in parking there.  The arbiter ruled in my favor, dismissed the case but then said, "You had to take the time to get here, make your case to contest this ticket, next time, don't park there, it's not worth it."  He said the spot was in a curbside loading zone (which isn't specifically marked) and that I could be towed next time.  It was worth it; I cleared my name and saved the $60 fine.

Thing is, as far as the law goes, I'm legal, the signs are on my side.  The ruling was in my favor, why should I stop parking there, except for that ever-present specter of a tow or a ticket hanging over my head?  What would you do?